Updated: Jul 13, 2018
On a date night last fall (Aug 11th 2017 to be exact), Dustin and I talked about our desire for kiddos. Trying the “normal” way had not worked up to this point after 2 years of trying and not that we were giving up, but we decided to look into some other options.
--But not foster care.
In the midst of looking into every adoption agency and talking to other adoptive families, we began setting up appointments to chat with each one. One particular week held two such appointments, one was with Families First Network simply to adopt through the system…
--Not to be foster parents.
That week I had coffee with a friend of a friend who as a foster momma herself showed me the love and grace God gives, but I left telling her I couldn’t possible fill the shoes of what it takes to be a foster momma. At church that Sunday, a particular adoptive mother told me to read 1 Samuel and truly connect with Hannah’s desire. She then told me “God is not a God of confusion” when I confessed we had no idea which way to turn. That afternoon I prayed so hard – I told God that my heart and emotions were not to be trusted. I needed Him to guide and confide in Dustin to lead our family.
That night Dustin told me to cancel our other appointments – he felt guided towards helping the kids in our area who needed it most and adopting through foster care.
--But only adoption, not fostering.
--Did I make that clear? Okay, good.
Long story short, the sweetest lady came and sat in our home and told us amazing stories, built into us as individuals, encouraged us as a couple, and told us the need in our community – and how Christ’s love through us can change someone’s trajectory.
As she pulled out of our driveway and we were shutting our gate, Dustin goes “I think we can do this Rach. In fact, we were meant to do this. We need to be foster parents.”
Not one ounce of confusion resided in my heart as he said this, I knew in that moment this was to be our path. But definitely my first experience of motherhood anxiety!
Are you at a decision making place in your life where confusion has taken over? Take it to God, truly lay it down. Wait for peace and clarity, it will come dear friend. Just maybe, His peace bringing answer will be exactly what you’ve said no to all along… And oh man is it going to be an exciting ride!