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Bad Choices Do Not Make Bad People: You know, like that choice in New York everyone is talking about

My foster kiddos always have questions about their bio-families – and we stick to the truth. One truth we repeat is that their bio-moms or bio-dads made a bad choice – HOWEVER – they are not bad people.


Can we all be honest and admit we ALL make bad choices?


The logical response I know you are thinking is – but yeah, my bad choice was not as bad as theirs. Oh, so now we are on a scaling system?


Lawmakers in New York just made it okay for you to make the choice to abort your baby up to full term. Are you madder at the lawmakers or potential mothers making the choice? Was it in having sex or for whatever reason they are giving up this life? Does it make you feel different knowing it is a homeless woman unable to provide, or a CEO who does not feel like she has the time?


My bio-families made the choice of life – however their kids are now in foster care. Was the choice in having kids, in treating them poorly, in the trauma that happened, or in the illegal actions they took?


My husband and I made the choice to open our home to foster children. Was it right to say yes to all three of them at this time? Have we made all the right decisions in how to raise them versus the other foster family with more experience they could have gone to?


This law in New York is only a permission slip for someone else to make a choice: it is not a demand, it is not forcing an action.


We have the opportunity to support those who are at the crossroads with this choice to make:


-Fight for the pregnant mom who feels like there is nowhere to go – by giving her a place to go.

-Show the CEO what grace looks like despite what corporations push onto her.

-Write lawmakers to fight for laws and opportunities that make the choice of life less scary.

-Volunteer to show bio families what grace looks like to be able to reunite with their kids.

-Be a foster parent or support a foster family that welcomes and cherishes the gift of life.


Do not fight the idea that there is now a choice to be made – let’s be honest – this choice was always there; but instead be a part of the choice of life. Open your home to the pregnant mother AND the child that comes. And how about opening your home to the mother who made this choice for whatever reason and now feels shame or hurt – she is worth fighting for. I am pro-life for her life as well.


And lastly, if you are going to fight for the choice of life to be made – start living yours in a way that honors it. Maybe you need to start giving grace to your choices, so you can give grace to others.


How are you going to support the choice of life? What are you doing today to make a difference?


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